How is that wrong? I’ll tell you how that’s wrong!

I see absolutely nothing wrong with getting drunk at a baby shower.  Especially one that serves cosmopolitans, or has a cooler or two of beer on the back porch.

So, to all you ladies that plan to spring the booze + babies racket on your friends, know this:

I’m on to you.  Having me sit through hours of baby holding, bunting oohing, and silly games playing might get me drunk.  It will NOT, however, get me drunk enough to join the baby making brigade.  GOT IT?!  Good.  Now take your baby gap clad grub worm back, and hand me my beer.

6 Responses to “How is that wrong? <i>I’ll tell you how that’s wrong!</i>”


  1. 1 SP February 28, 2008 at 8:55 am

    What brought this on?

    Someone got mad that I’ve been to two baby showers where alcohol was served. She got all uppity about it, and like usual, I couldn’t think of something to say to her. So I walked away, and wrote that later. Dumb C-WORD! C-WORD! C-WORD!

  2. 2 Guv'ner February 28, 2008 at 10:33 am

    I am stunned with your sense.

    Count me in. In fact, why not have a beer shower and just drop the whole baby element altogether? Who needs babies for a drinking session? Sheesh!

    The babies make a good excuse to drink, so i don’t think we can do away with them entirely. How else are we going to train the perfect ‘help?’

    Only been to one good one. SP threw Preggie one and it flowed like water… I mean the party, not the beer. Well ok, both, but alcohol or no alcohol (dear GOD that hurt to say,) it was the best I’ve been to.

  3. 3 pistols at dawn February 28, 2008 at 12:14 pm

    Dear people, your kids are boring. Until they can talk or possibly walk, they’re pretty much pointless. I don’t go to baby showers because I’m a dude, but when friends have babies, I tell them I’ll only come see them once every six months, because babies don’t do anything and I don’t want to pretend that it almost taking a step is worth my ooh-ing and aah-ing.

    Can it solve deferential equations yet? No? Can it get me a job? No? It just ate its first grape yesterday? Don’t call me anymore.

    Strange, that when the children are related to me, this is how I feel. When they are the product of a good friend’s folly–I mean, strategy to life–I actually find that I like them more. Probably because after I’m done playing with them, or the start crying, or thinking real hard, I can just hand them back, and not get guilted into nappy changing, or trying to catch pigs as they run run run run all the way home!

  4. 4 Guv'ner February 28, 2008 at 1:06 pm

    It just ate its first grape yesterday? Don’t call me anymore.

    Pistols. Dude….:) Thank you.

    And instant classic! However, seeing as my friends read this blog, I will have to admonish you for your unfeeling attitude towards their bundles of joy. (ROCK ON!)

  5. 5 porcelet February 29, 2008 at 1:22 pm

    I’ve updated!

    I’m so happy, I dropped kimchi in my keyboard!

  6. 6 Dell as it be March 3, 2008 at 4:22 pm

    I would say that baby showers are right behind weddings – alcohol is pretty much a requirement to guest survival. Look, the guest of honor can’t drink, but if they feel it’s a good idea to have the means for their friends to, why not? You shell out way too much money on clothes the kids might get to wear three times if you are lucky…the least they can do is give you a beer or two.

    Or a man hot, and rich, enough to risk the ‘tip’ with. Damnit. I shouldn’t say these things to you. And yet, backspace just seems so wrong right now.


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